Ane Brun

yet another favorite song and another creative video. . .

Let the Forgivering Commence

So, forgive me for not posting yesterday and good morning. Sunday night was a night of restless sleep that not even an old episode of Star Trek could fix. I feel better today, despite having to get up at 5:30. I know, I know; it's bullshit if there ever was some. I have to be at work by 7:00 today, blah, blah, blah.

Combine that with not being able to recall my dreams again and you've got one cranky boy. I've come to the conclusion that the key is to wake up and then go back to sleep for about an hour.

So, since I cannot entertain you with any bizarre dreams, let me tell you that roller derby kicks ass! Sunday night was a blast. It took me a bit to get the general concept and figure out the rules. Once I got all that down, I was all about me some roller derby! These girls don't fuck around! We were able to sit right next to the track and almost got crashed into several times. The most serious accident of the night happened right in front of us. One of the girls went down and took a skate to the head. Paramedics are on hand for such things thank god. It was later determined that she was okay, they took her to the E.R. just as a precaution. Turns out she was a librarian too; just goes to show it's a sport for everybody.

Just a reminder; Friday is Groundhog Day. Make sure you have a Woodchuck in honor of this most important of useless holidays. I find it amazing that a large rodent has the power to determine the length of winter. If this is the case, then why aren't people bringing offerings and sacrifices to this most powerful of rodents?!

Everybody have an awesome day today! I'm gonna go look for my Forgiverer.

School Supplies

Very nice, very nice Sunday to you world. Meh. Let's get down to the gritty and talk about some dreams! Yay! Seems I decided to go back to school. To my shock it was not college, nor was it high school. It was something like middle school or Jr. high! I was in a classroom, registering I suppose. There was a man at a desk, one of those little ones that are so fun to sit in, he gave me a book and told me to read it. I asked him if there would be a test afterwards and he said no, just read the book. As I walked to the next room I thought to myself, "I'm going to destroy these kids with my awesome brain skills!" I went to the next room and decided to sit in the back as I always do. There seemed to be some sort of lesson being taught which I ignored as I looked around the room sizing up my competition and looking for possible 'girl friends.' I quickly realized that the girls in the class were just a wee bit young for me. Then I became very self aware of my age. Oh, this is not good! I'm a thirty year old in 8th grade! Then, some sort of proctor came in, handing out a test. Turns out it was my old boss from the coffee shoppe. What a jackass! We had a brief tete a tete. Something about how my last name was really Smarinsky or something of that nature, then a joke about pornography. This is the point where I realised that I was living in a foster home. All the other 'kids' were also foster types. I became enraged at the fact that jackass was actually one of my foster parents. That's all I remember folks. Ah, so nice to be able to remember them once again!

#24601

Weeee! Good morning world! Dreams, glorious dreams! Alas, boring dreams. Seriously, somebody in dream production needs to be fired! I don't need to be dreaming about work, I go there enough as it is. The only thing I found odd about the dream was that my boss was wearing a black suit. Either he was going to a funereal or out to some swanky club. Oh, and styrofoam, lots of styrofoam.

What's going on here today? Let's see, we've got coffee and cartoons at the moment. I'm just contemplating what all needs to get done today. I think I'll be productive today and destroy a massive list of chores; productive destruction.

As for that photo today; yea, yea, real artsy. Cool for now, but you can't really see the crazy hair. I'll not be doing that again for a while, just wanted to experiment a bit. I'm off folks; gotta get clean and get going. You guys and gals have fun today!

American Idol - Dalek Style

Those pesky Daleks!

Insert Witty Title Here

Good morning and good luck! Okay, okay, okay; I know I slept in today! I think I really needed to though. Ten hours of beautiful, restful coziness. Plus, I don't have to be at work til 9:30 anyway. I had about four dreams, maybe five and somehow remember none of it. This is getting frustrating! Maybe I need to defragment my brain somehow.....

Let us rejoice at this time as it is Friday and payday! The weekend will officially begin sometime this afternoon. I've no idea what you folks are going to do with your weekends, but I'm going to see the local roller derby team, The Tragic City Rollers, on Sunday. Wooohooo!

-Note: thank god this thing has a spell check!

Could've Been One of These Things First

Whoa! Good morning world! So. . . .I slept in a bit this morning and for good reason. The annual sales team party ran off the tracks last night. This is a party for our sales team that we have every year. We get some ribs from Dreamland and have awesome wines too. The whole thing derailed around ten o'clock. Several people got very drunk. There's nothing worse than having to convince somebody who's wasted that they cannot and will not drive themselves home.

Slept in today, oh boy. I'm not going to blame myself, though I should. Seriously, who else am I going to blame? Not feeling so hot today; I'm just worn out from doing something every night this week. All these social activities are draining my powers. How can I fight evil if all I want to do is hide under a blanket?

Okay kids, I'm done and I really need to go get ready for work!

Rock On!

This....hair.....ROCKS! I love it, love it, love it! Bad news though, I can't remember the damned dreams. I'm not sure what the trick is with that. I'm going to look at the dream book and see if it has any tips for me. I'm pretty sure I saw that there was a section related to this topic. Honestly, I think the trick has to be not getting distracted. Dream memories are very fragile things. If I get distracted by something (like that alarm clock!) it seems my brain just dumps the info on my dreams and replaces it with the current sensory inputs.

Get out of my head Apocalypse Pony! That song is stuck in my head!

Who all watched 'W' last night? Not me, thank you very much. I feel guilty though. I've always made it a point to sit down and watch the state of the union address. American Idol, now that's entertainment (shoves finger in mouth). Seems the local pub is going to run with this 'karaoke/Idol' thing. Seeing the drunken regulars stumbling about and singing is mildly amusing, but it mostly saddens me. What? What did you ask? Oh, the game last night?! If you haven't heard yet; Auburn destroyed Alabama last night down on the plains! What a joke, there is no way Alabama should be ranked so high, and now they won't. I'm a 'Bama fan, but thank God that when it comes to basketball the Jayhawks are my team.

Wake up! It's Wednesday! You look awesome today and I feel awesome. So, let's all have fun and giggle our way through the day. Have a great one!

My Little Pony will never be the same. . .

Morning Failure

Yea, so. . .I overslept today; go figure. I stayed up too late last night and I payed for it this morning. There just wasn't any time to sit down and post this morning. On the other hand, I'm home now and I'm going to take a nap after I eat that sammich over there. I've officially failed in my attempt to get up every day at 6 a.m. However, if I can manage to do it the rest of the week, I will consider it a success. I'll still be sleeping in on the weekend though. Lord knows I'll need to. Because I didn't post this morning I'm going to go find some hilarious video or something to post for your amusements! Then I'm eating that sammich and taking a nap! I hope the world is treating everyone with kindness and warmth.

Shotgun Start

Tips to getting out of bed at 6 a.m. : ------------------------------------------------

1. When the alarm goes off, look at it.
2. Listen to the alarm for at least 3 seconds.
3. Turn off the alarm.
4. Mutter profanity.
5. Get out of bed (this is the key step).

------------------------------------------------

Wow! Nice bedhead today! My bangs look like a tidal wave. Weeeee. Hmmm, I slept pretty well; only woke up a few times during the night and I remember parts of the last dream I had.

Started off by arriving to a front yard, two cars here with guys getting out, dressed for golf. Hell yea! I suck at golf and I still love to play. Seems we were meeting up to play today. We started warming up in the front yard, hitting balls, practicing swings, etc. One of the guys fussed at me about being careful (can't remember why). Suddenly, I love how this happens in dreams, we were no longer in somebody's front yard, but at the golf course! Still hitting balls, practicing. Now, at this point is where I realize that I was starting to get pissed. The other guys were doing their thing, but every time I would get ready to swing, something would fuck it up. A branch would hit my club on the back swing or more often, people would get in my way. Where they were coming from I have no idea! These jackasses were just walking across the golf course, all la tee da; dressed like they were going to a water park, the lake or pic nic. BAM! Suddenly, I'm in my room and back to my childhood. I'm in bed and very aware that I'm going hunting today. I get out of bed so that I can go out on the roof to shoot some skeet with my shotgun. I noticed a fitted sheet in the window, I wondered why that was there. Then my step dad came in the room (the first one, not my current step dad). He was dressed in camo and booming about something. Still just as fat as he was in real life. He was drunk too. He asked me what I was doing, so I told him I was going to practice shooting before we went hunting. He seemed fine with this, though normally he would have been majorly pissed about me shooting firearms on the roof of the house. Then, he asked me where I got that sword. For some reason I panicked. I lied and said I got it at a comic book type store. All I can remember about the sword, is that it was on the wall, sticking out from behind a painting. Hmmm? He seemed satisfied with the story and left the room. I think this is the end of the dream.

Another dream about a father figure, with guns too?! My step dad would never be drunk that early in the morning, much less drunk at all. However, he was a major asshole. I don't want you guys to think my childhood was a nightmare or something.

Monday! Woohoo! If anybody does read this, have a great day!

It's a Sad Bedazzled World

When will the madness stop! This is the kinda shit I'm talking about!

There's a Gun in My Toilet!

Good day to you all! Today is Sunday, a lovely greay day with several drops of rain here and there. What I do remember about my dreams last night isn't very much and not very interesting either. I'll just not worry about it today. *Sigh* The goal for the upcoming week is to be up at six a.m. every day. I'm sure most of you may find this odd as you probably already do that. I'm not required to punch a clock for work; this has led to my habitual over sleeping. I will put forth a serious effort and I'm excited about getting home earlier in the day too which will allow for naps in the afternoon. Also, a point was made today. It seems all my photos are taken in the bathroom, so I took one of myself at the desk, sipping out of my coffee tankard. Oh, and there will be a staff meeting tomorrow at 9pm cst. If you're not there, then your ideas will not be addressed. Sam, you're in charge of refreshments.

My Kingdom for a Bedazzler!

Mmmhhhmmm! Good morning world! It's Saturday, the weekend is here. Just so you know I'm not going to be getting out of bed at 'normal' people hours on Saturday. I was out pretty late last night. We found a cool bar in town, tucked away in the basement of some shops. Very cozy and what an awesome freakin' juke box. When I go back, I'm gonna take my camera and have my picture taken with Jake and Elwood!

Today I thought I would show off my new scarf that my friend Clovis made for me. To date it's the best homemade scarf I've ever had. Today's theme is greay by the way.

No dreams to report this morning. Alcohol seems to just knock those right out. I'm sure I had some, but I don't recall them. I did however get a nap in yesterday. The first one all week! Just the cat and I on the couch, those are the best.

Holly shit! It's a Bedazzler commercial! Ha! "I don't own a Bedazzler Mother Fucker!"

Today shall be fun. I'm going to work on my french, do laundry and then go Bedazzle something!

http://www.mybedazzler.com/?cid=200458

The Mall is a F'd up Place

So, this is what 6a.m. is like? Not very exciting. Good day for the blog though. I went into the bathroom to check the 'fro and it's a wild one. The picture doesn't really get the full effect. Coffee is in hand and I think I've got a good idea of what that last dream was about.

Seems I was headed to the mall, what looked, or was supposed to be one of the local malls. Spooky dream world ambiance here. Night time with a weird greenish/blue glow all around. So, I'm driving and noticing that they've been real busy adding on to the mall, saw a really cool looking theatre outside the mall, lots of pretty trees, everything seemed new and clean. Upon getting to the actual mall area, I soon realized that I had not pulled into a parking deck but the mall itself. Doh! I quickly did a U turn and drove out of the mall. Seems nobody noticed. Whew! Off I went to the parking deck. It was dark, dirty; the kind of parking deck you don't want to be in late at night. I decided to park as close to the entrance as possible. However, this was an expensive proposition, as each parking spot was labeled with a price painted on the ground. I decided to park in a spot that was around $120. Seems good spots have their price! I don't recall the walk from the car to the entrance, but I do recall going into the mall. If the outside of the mall looked Utopian, the inside of the mall was something out of RoboCop. Dirty white tiles, trash on the floor, but I kept walking. Once through the entrance/lobby area, the mall took on more normal features. Clean, well lit, lots of shops and what not. Quickly I realized that I didn't want to be at the mall and had no reason to be there. I turned around and headed back out. This is the weird part. Back in the rundown entrance area, a naked street urchin type man approached me. It was obvious he was hurting for a fix of something. He asked me for some pot and I told him I didn't have any. Then I saw somebody behind him, another person with a camera. This person was snapping pictures of the homeless guy. Maybe that's not too weird, but I can't really describe what that guy looked like. It's hard to convey these images at times, but I have an imprint in my mind, creepy. That's all I remember. Overall, I'd say it was a good one; not frightening, just weird at times.

TGIF! I wish everyone an excellent weekend.

Double Edged Sword

Hell yea suckas! I got my coffee! This really has really started the day off right; not soo much profanity this morning. Once again I've overslept; this is getting out of control. My sleep pattern has gotten screwed up as of late and I've got to fix it. This is a double edged sword though, as I have my best dreams if I sleep in and they're easier to recall. Bead head wasn't soo good/bad this morning. I am seeing a pattern though; seriously, look at all that blue stuff, shirt, towel, shower curtain. . .need to get some other colors out of the closet.

Yea, well it was bound to happen sooner or later; the sex dream. I'll spare the intimate details on this one. It was fun though, my paramour was a crazy girl that I dated about 3 years ago, she was all about some s-e-x. Had to let her go after she started throwing rocks at my windows, climbing up on my back porch; all at 3 am. Oh well. Let's see what the book says. . .seems dreaming about a pleasurable sexual experience denotes happiness and contentment in your personal relationships. That's cool, I did have a really good day yesterday, in that I didn't have to deal with any assholes or negative type folks. Everybody I ran into yesterday was in a good mood, gotta love those days. I'll have to shoot for two days in a row.

Guess, I'll keep it brief, I'm already late as it is. I don't know if any of you guys are following my orders on spreading joy in the world. That's okay if you don't. I'm not going to force you to do anything. I on the other hand will strive to do my best! Oh, and this CD I got from Itunes, rocks. It's 70's porno music! Rock on people!

My Very Own Vomiting Alarm Clock

Errrrr. I am awake, I think. Thank god for Wednesdays! I really don't have to do too much at work on Wednesdays; I get to sleep in!

It's soo pleasant to be awoken by the sound of your cat vomiting in the other room, then, once the hack n' yack is done, he prances into your room, hops on the bed and proceeds to go to work on your foot, clawing and biting! Thanks John Lee you're such a great roommate. I thought I'd add a shot of him today as he seems to be getting in on the process as well. He likes to watch me type, though I have a suspicion that he's just lusting after my hands, wanting to eat them for breakfast.

Oh, the sun is out! I hate waking up, knowing that the sun should be up and it's all greay and overcast(that's how I spell 'grey' or 'gray', deal with it). Things are spiralling out of control here. I failed, again, to obtain coffee and milk yesterday. This has got to be done today, I had to resort to the last of my sweet tea; that'll have to go on the list too. Might as well get that dream book too while I'm at it. I've got too many gift cards to use. I mean really, I'm going to have to set aside a day where I pile up all my gift cards and drive all over town shopping. I hate that feeling of walking in to a store and having to spend money.

I cannot remember any dreams this morning, I feel bad about that, but not really. I just enjoy my dreams soo much, they're like watching TV. Everyday can't be perfect I suppose. Why am I covering my face? Shit, I don't know; I'm trying to be as spontaneous as possible with the photos. So, if I can't remember any dreams. . .I'll tell you about. . . yea, uh, I got nothing. Let's all go out there and make somebody feel special today. It's not hard to do, just say something nice, "Wow, you look great today." for example. While you're at it, say a prayer for me, I've got to get that coffee. . .

Celebrity Death Match

Brrr, little nippy this morn'. Okay, I think the routine is starting to come together. Wake up, pee, make/start coffee, take photo, obtain coffee, activate pc. If you read yesterday's entry, I mentioned that sometimes I have 'movie' quality dreams. Well, that's what I had this morning. I only recall the end of it. Let's see, I was at my dad's house and had seemingly pissed him off. He was trying to chase me around the ground floor of the house. Being the clever person I am, I was able to get behind him and just follow him from room to room without being spotted. This didn't last long, I started giggling at my father's incompetence at tracking me. That's about the part he found me. What a confrontation it was, we came around the same corner, just from opposite sides, so we were standing in front of each other:

Dad-"Gotcha!"

Me- "So, what are you gonna do?" still giggling

Dad- raises pistol, little James Bond type gun

Me- taken aback, "Uh, you do know that those aren't very accurate?"

Dad- with sarcasm "Oh, really?"

Me- "Yup."

That's all we said, I turned around and proceeded to walk out the back door. A shot was fired, but guess what, it missed. Like I said, those little pistols aren't very accurate; especially in the hands of incompetent fathers. The back yard just happened to be the same as my grandfather's(paternal, go figure). I sat down at the table and proceeded to fire up my laptop so I could listen to some tunes on the house's sound system. That's when my step mom came outside and sat down. To my surprise, it was Julia Louise Dreyfus(Seinfeld) as my step mom. I proceeded to tell her that the speakers on the back of the house sucked and she replied that it was just that crappy music I listen to. And. . . .scene! That's all I remember. My dad was also played by a pseudo-famous actor, I just don't know his name.

Irony, what a concept! Here I am, a guy that's in and out of grocery stores all day, and I cannot remember to pick up coffee and milk. The two things I told myself to pick up yesterday. I am forced to drink this vanilla rum shit that i accidentally bought a while back because it looks just like my normal bag of beans. Ugh! I got a gift cert. for Barnes and Nobull for my b'day; I think I'm gonna get a book on dreams so I can try to get a handle on what these dreams are all about. For entertainment purposes only, books are not therapists! Hmmmm, what if books were the rapists? Stay safe out there and try to smile from time to time.

Plastic Paris

Hmmm, yea so day one or morning number one. It's Monday and to top it off it's going to rain today. I forgot to just lie there when i woke up so as to recall all that i dreamed about. I can only recall bits and pieces, a general theme really. I was in a back yard with some other parents, which is the next thing, apparently I had a child at some point last night! The only image that I can remember is one of a plastic Eiffle tower, oh about 4 feet tall. Seems my 'dream baby' likes to play in it. Ha! That's why I said that! When I awoke, at the time I couldn't understand why, I said aloud, "How am I going to get that fucking thing in the car?!" The 'child' was never seen, I just got the feeling that I had one. Funny, sometimes that's all I can remember about my dreams, feelings, themes or ideas. Other times it's like watching a movie and I can remember too much. Oh, this is fucking great, the 'italics' is still on and I cannot undo it! Ah, got that, thanks brain, just have to press ctrl-i again, nice. I need some coffee. . . .

Funny? I didn't have a mohawk when I fell asleep. . .

This is the photo that prompted this adventure. My friend Sam gets all the credit for the idea. Sam is also my production assistant and hopefully will be a good advisor as this is my first ever online journal.

The whole idea is to show the world what my crazy hair looks like in the morning. Also, I may add whatever random thoughts I'm having before I'm completely awake. I'm going to try to remember the bizarre dreams I have too, and if I do I'll let you all in on those as well.